How to Worry Properly

Worrying is an inevitable aspect of the human condition.  Telling someone, “Don’t worry” is usually a futile platitude.  We all worry at some point and for many people it’s daily.  From big concerns (health issues, finances, job, etc.) to smaller (weight, schedules, daily decisions, etc.) we always seem to have something causing us concern.

In this article, we aren’t going to tell you not to worry – you will anyway. Instead, let’s discuss how to worry so it doesn’t cause undo stress that will ruin your health and so it frees up some mental space for more positive endeavors.  Here are my five strategies to worry properly.

Ask Yourself This Important Question

Ask yourself, “Is there anything I can do about this right now? If not, it may be time for a distraction while you work to consciously keep the worrying thoughts at bay. For me, the best distractions are those that occupy my brain and body so that I’m forced to think of something else.  This could include listening to music (coupled with a walk, it’s a great way to distract); watching TV, reading a book, taking a yoga class, doing some other form of exercise, cooking, or talking on the phone to a friend or family member.

Breathe

I always think intentional breathing is a miracle cure for stress, worry, headaches, and other ailments. I’ve provided a resource on my favorite breathing techniques in the Resources page of www.intentionalwellnessbyterri.com.  Click here to access those techniques. Intentional breathwork calms your nervous system, clears the energetic pathways in your body, and helps you gain perspective because you’re calmer.

Plan

If there is something you can do about the source of your worry take some time to set a course of action. Here’s an example, suppose you’ve discovered you have a health concern. Set an appointment or call with your doctor or healthcare provider. Make a list of questions you’ll ask. Determine steps you can take right now depending on what the health issue is and then act (in our example, are there foods to avoid? lifestyle changes to make? etc.). Determine who you need to inform and make those calls. Rearrange work or home schedules if needed. Planning eliminates some of the low-level stress and makes you feel better because you know what to do next.

Take Control

Sometimes we allow things that we’re worried about to control us. I recommend that you flip the switch and take back control. Here’s an example to help illustrate this point. Suppose someone is worrying because they made an error at work and are hoping that no one notices. That kind of worrying is unlikely to resolve on its own.  Take back control – talk to whomever you need to and admit to the mistake.  At the same time, present ideas for fixing the error or at least minimizing the consequences.  It may be uncomfortable in the moment when you must admit what you did, but in the long run it will be much better to eliminate the stressful worrying that guilt can bring.

Discuss

Often the best thing to do is talk it out. Gaining another person’s perspective may help mitigate some of the unnecessary aspects of your worry. I suggest you talk it out with someone who is a good listener, will be non-judgmental, and who might be able to make you laugh or smile in the process.

So, to quote Bobby McFerrin in his famous song, Don’t Worry, Be Happy. Easier said than done!